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chradi · 1 year ago
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Needing to potentially make a big decision that would save me A Lot of heartache while also still hurting myself and others in the process waughuaghough.
I guess at some point, you gotta balance the pros and the cons and realise that not many pros can balance out “borderline heart palpitations and entire ruined days multiple times a month”
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coolstoriesbro · 2 years ago
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FOR THE ONES WE LOVE | CH. 1
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FANDOM: The Walking Dead
SERIES: For the Ones We Love
STATUS: Ongoing
ERA: Prison
PAIRING: Eventual Daryl Dixon x Female Reader (No Use of “Y/N”)
CHAPTER ONE: Backseat Driver
WORD COUNT: 2k
SUMMARY: Daryl Dixon gets much more than he bargained for when his motorcycle breaks down while out on a run. Miles from the prison, he has no other choice but to hot-wire a car he comes across on the side of the road, only to discover that he wasn’t the first person to get there.
RATING: Mature
WARNINGS: Language, Mention of Attempted Sexual Assault, Symptoms of PTSD
A/N: While I’m not new to writing fanfic, this is my first attempt at Tumblr fanfic, which is somewhat different than what I’m used to. I have a whole backstory dreamed up for this character (she’s a nursing student who escaped from Grady Memorial after it was overtaken by Dawn and Gorman), but I know from what I’ve read of Tumblr fanfic, self-insert fics are preferred. This is my first attempt at that, so any constructive criticism is welcome. Please let me know your thoughts on the story as well. I have several chapters already written, just trying to decide what format to proceed with/if there’s an audience for it.
“Wow, thanks for that.”
At the sound of an unfamiliar voice coming from behind him, Daryl Dixon’s eyes flew to the rearview mirror as you sat up from where you’d been lying in the backseat of the car he’d just hot-wired. The all too familiar noise of a hammer clicking into place sounded as you lifted your arms, aiming a revolver directly at the back of his head.
With the way you trained the gun on him, combined with the intense gaze in your eyes, he knew that you’d shot it before.
Of course you had.
A woman, alone in this world?
There was no way in hell you could’ve survived as long as you had not knowing how to use a gun.
Daryl cut the engine and raised his hands. “This your car?”
You shrugged. “No, but I was here first.”
“I got it runnin’; makes it more mine than yours.”
“I was getting to that.” You said defensively.
“Bullshit.” Daryl scoffed. “Ya don’t know how to hot-wire a car.”
“How do you know?”
“‘Cause ya ain’t that kinda girl.”
The stranger’s assumption pissed you off, but what pissed you off even more was the fact that he was right. Before he came along, you’d been close to having a full-on meltdown when finding the car just a few minutes earlier, only to discover that the keys were missing from the ignition. There’d been a hell of a lot of abandoned cars that you’d passed during your travels over the past couple of weeks, because apparently even after a goddamn apocalypse, nobody left their keys behind.
And who was he to pass judgement on you? With his Harley Davidson vest, greasy hair and the ability to steal a car in the first place — this guy was lucky you’d given him any warning at all. Although you hadn’t spoken to another human being since escaping the hospital, and were beginning to think you were missing even the most trivial of conversations, you had quickly come to the conclusion that human interaction was entirely overrated.
Especially with this particular human.
“How the hell do you know what kind of girl I am?” You practically growled.
Daryl hesitated, knowing that he ought to tread lightly, yet somehow his mouth decided to run off anyway. “Just do.”
Your eyes widened as you lunged forward to press the barrel of the gun to the back of his skull. “You don’t fucking know me.”
Dumbass, Daryl scolded himself.
What was he thinking, arguing with someone who was pressing a loaded gun to his head? After all this time spent fighting to survive, did he have a death wish all of a sudden?
With his hands still raised, Daryl nodded, his senses finally returning to him. “We can change that. I’m Daryl.”
Suddenly, a memory of your mother warning you not to talk to strangers appeared as the man introduced himself, and you had to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing. After a few seconds, you lowered your gun and laughed out loud, no longer able to keep it inside.
The entire situation was absurd. You were running on zero sleep, hadn’t eaten anything in days, and hadn’t spoken to another soul since you’d left Atlanta. It was the most inappropriate thing in the world to be laughing in your current situation, and yet you couldn’t stop.
Daryl hesitated. He thought he might be okay at handling a pissed off woman — but a crazy, pissed off woman?
Might as well shoot myself now.
“Ya crazy or somethin’?” Daryl found himself asking.
You laughed harder at his question, leaning against the backseat as your sides started to ache. “Or something.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Ya gotta name or not?”
Once regaining your composure, you peered over the passenger seat and noticed the large crossbow that he’d laid down while working on getting the car started. You also noted the backpack slung over his shoulder with several arrows sticking out through the flap. “Give me your arrows and any other weapons you have. Maybe I’ll tell you then.”
“Don’t wanna know that bad.”
“Hah.” You rolled your eyes, aiming the revolver at his head once more. “Wasn’t asking.”
With an irritated grumble, Daryl shrugged off his bag and handed it over. There was a brief pause while he rummaged around in his pants and pulled out a pistol, extending it to you handle first.
“No knife?” You asked suspiciously. 
He cursed under his breath, but a few seconds later you had a hunting knife to add to your collection as well. Finally satisfied, you met his eyes in the rearview mirror and told him your name.
“You alone?”
“Looks like it.”
The silence between the two of you clung in the air like smoke. Daryl kept his eyes glued to you now that you had all of his weapons, minus his crossbow, which was useless without the bolts. 
He didn’t pride himself on much, but one of the few things that he’d always felt he excelled at was being a good judge of character. The woman in front of him was young, probably mid-twenties, and pretty. In Daryl’s experience, pretty women were absolute bitches, but not necessarily dangerous. Even so, he couldn’t brand you with that particular title just for pulling a gun on him. You were only protecting yourself.
“Mind lowerin’ that thing? I did give ya all my weapons.” Daryl reasoned.
You paused, but reluctantly lowered your gun, your eyes locked on his as you sat it down on your lap.
“How’s that?” You asked.
“Depends, can I turn around without havin’ to worry ‘bout ya blowin’ my head off?”
You stilled at his words but found yourself slowly nodding your head in agreement.
When Daryl turned all the way around to face you, you held your breath. The last time you’d been this close to a man, it was Gorman, and he had tried to assault you.
The world had been a dangerous place for women far longer than it had been for men. Men may have recently had to learn what it was like to fear strangers now that the world had ended, but it had aways been something to fear for women, which made it twice as frightening these days.
As you studied Daryl, you noticed that he had lighter facial hair than that on his head, and pale blue eyes. With his intense gaze and bare biceps, he had a rugged air about him that you had a feeling he’d always possessed. He seemed like the kind of man who didn’t need an apocalypse to know how to fight for his life.
The two of you remained as you were, staring at each other for a tense moment, sizing each other up and down as you both tried to decide whether or not the other was a threat.
“Lay down.” Daryl grunted.
“What?” You blanched, your hand moving towards the revolver once more.
“Down!” He hissed.
Jumping over the partition dividing the front and back sections of the car, Daryl slid to his knees, tucking himself in the floor space behind the passenger seat, his hands clutching you by the elbows as he pulled you down, tugging your body flush against the backseat cushions.
When Daryl grabbed you, your first thought was a vile one, but your grip around the gun relaxed ever so slightly when he landed beneath you rather than on top of you.
“What the fu—” You cried as you both lurched forward, a series of bangs sounding at the rear of the car. Rather than finish your crude sentence, you cut yourself off when Daryl’s hand covered your mouth. Feeling your jaw tense against his palm, he raised a finger to his lips when his eyes met yours, slowly easing his hand away as a horde of walkers appeared from a clearing in the woods by the side of the road.
You both remained that way for what truly could have been hours, the only sound being your heavy breathing and the groans of the horde as they trudged along either side of the car like cattle. When the noise finally died down some time later, Daryl held a hand out to signal for you to wait, then eased up on his haunches ever so slightly, peering out the front windshield to find that the horde had wandered off up the road.
Once given the all clear, you slowly lifted your body from the backseat, your hand instantly going to the side of your neck as you attempted to work out the kink that had formed there from laying in such an awkward position. 
“Jesus.” You muttered.
Remaining where he was for fear that you’d think he might try something now that he was in close proximity of his weapons, Daryl kept his eyes on you for a few silent seconds.
“Look, I know all about wantin’ to be alone, but no one can make it alone now. You can keep my weapons, even hold your damn gun on me while I drive, but I have a camp a few miles back. My bike broke down, s’why I was lookin’ for a ride, but I can take ya someplace secure. I’m with a group of people back at a prison.”
“A prison? Really?” You asked curiously.
Christ. Was that actual hope in your voice? Had the last year not completely crushed you of that?
“Yeah.” Daryl nodded. “There’s eight of us. Men, women, a boy, and a baby.” Nodding towards his backpack, he continued. “Open it.”
Cautiously moving your hand to his backpack, you unsnapped the top and drew back the flap to reveal several tins of powdered baby formula. Running your fingers over the lids, you hesitated, your eyes slowly returning to Daryl. If this was some kind of trick to get you to come along, it was pretty elaborate.
“I just gotta ask ya three questions first.” He said.
With your curiosity getting the better of you, you shrugged your shoulders. “Go for it.”
“How many walkers ya killed?”
“Walkers? You mean, the living dead freaks that have taken over the world?”
Daryl nodded.
“I don’t know. Who keeps track of that shit?”
Daryl had to admit, at least to himself, you had a point. But it was one of the questions that Rick insisted on asking newcomers, and he wasn’t about to start breaking his rules for anyone.
Seeing that Daryl wasn’t willing to budge on the question, you sighed as you thought about it. “A dozen, at least.”
“How many people ya killed?”
Your mind instantly went to the lifeless eyes of Gorman and Dawn. 
“Two.” You answered, without a hint of remorse.
“Why?” He asked.
You stared at him, expressionless. “I’m a woman and I’ve pretty much been on my own since the world ended. Why do you think?”
Daryl stared right back at you, and in his fierce blue gaze, you knew that he understood you completely. 
“All right, let’s go.”
“That’s it? I passed?” You asked, surprised.
“Looks like it.” He grunted, using your choice of words from earlier and earning a small smile from you because of it.
“Okay.” You agreed. “I’ll ride back here, and I won’t hold my gun on you . . . unless you drive too slow.”
“Pfft.” Daryl scoffed as he climbed back over to the driver’s side and began to work on restarting the car. “Don’t gotta worry ‘bout that.”
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atomicpowered · 8 months ago
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twitter is a cesspit obviously but it is still regrettably one of the best places to get followers and hock my wares, (as well as keep up with people, another main goal of mine) but lately it hasn't been very kind to me in terms of people seeing my stuff.
Tumblr has its ups and downs but is always consistent, and also there's the continuous trickle of notes days to months after posting something.
Instagram I hate, I hate the format, I hate the scrolling, I hate how everything is an ad on there, but I have seen some growth, and also people find stuff on there after you post it.
Twitter, if I post something and it doesn't gain traction in 20 minutes its dead forever and there is nothing I can do about it. We all have different ideas of success but it used to be I'd call an art post that got anything over 200 notes a small success and anything over a thousand a big one. Pretty humble... I guess? But if I get 10 over all these days I'm lucky.
This has the stench of complaining on it but I also have a point. I'll see mutuals and people I follow alike QRTing things and being like "thanks for 10-100 likes!!!" And im like. "Wow. It's gotten that fucking dire out here." And "I should be more thankful for what I do have." So thanks a lot!
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rulanarinrush · 26 days ago
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Hi! I just want to let you know that you are my most beloved fanfic creator of Despair Time. I'm choosing to remain anonymous while posting this because I don't wish to appear impolite to other fanfic creators. Nevertheless, you are without a doubt my favorite. Your works that delve into various pairings have enabled me to gain a deeper understanding of the character dynamics that I had never considered before. I frequently read fanfictions on AO3. When I discovered that three of my favorite fics were all penned by you (even though one was posted anonymously, the writing style is still recognizable), I was so shocked and excited that I let out a scream.
From a more personal standpoint: (Though I wouldn't classify myself as a rareshipper) (I mainly ship Whitvid); (as far as I can recall, ) I was probably the first to post Whitvid-related art on Tumblr, thanks to your post titled "But you and I are only human in the end." Additionally, I am very fond of the time-loop theory and the idea of a Whit who is secretly ‘a bit unhinged yet not in a totally evil way.’ Your articles about the characters’ inner thoughts and your character studies are always so interesting to me and you've done them so well that I am greatly inspired after reading them.
From an even more personal perspective: I think that Whit is the top. Whenever I read your comments with (that guy who used Ryoma as an avatar) I burst into immense laughter :3
To sum up: Thank you for creating all the amazing fanfics! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^I will continue to support your work! 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
Thank you so, so much anon! Your words are so flattering! Favorite, wow! When I write character studies, I try to be honest with myself about their flaws and whether or not they would encourage each other or drag the other down, so I know they're not very romantic sometimes, but I find writing the tension to be so exciting, I'm glad you like them!
Whitvid is an awesome ship! They are very alike each other in the sense that they want to be nihilistic about the world, but I feel like the narrative of drdt is doing a great job of tackling why it can't work in David's case. Whit did a great job of shoring up his defenses unlike David, because he idolizes the dead. He has no star to place all his hopes on(David with Xander). He doesn't have to be vulnerable unlike David and the rest of the cast, and that really gets to David, because both hope and despair have no effect on him, nihilism at its absolute best and worst. "but you and I are only human in the end" was actually my very first non-drabble format drdt fic(published), so it does hold a special place in my heart! They're both messed up people in a way that attracts Whit but repulses David.
Haha, the timeloop theory! It's very interesting because the story could be metaphorical, meant to show how everyone will lose hope in their future if everything always repeats and there's no escape from the cycle(Teruko) but if there's any character in the cast that shows the most symptoms of being bored of the killing game, it's Whit for sure lol. Since much of his philosophy involves either not confronting or obscuring trauma, he's definitely fucked up. I'm glad that when I write Whit he doesn't come across as evil; it is sometimes a hard balance to strike because he's wise and perceptive. He knows how to hit people where it hurts, which is like... villain behavior coded(sorry, I can't remember the precise word for this). But none of the characters are presented as wholly evil in this cast, so even if Whit is a mastermind or traitor or some secret third thing, I'm sure "wholly evil" and "wholly good" won't be applicable to any character. That is, after all, one of the themes of ch2.
Yayyyy a top!Whit fan. I'm actually not particularly picky about who the top and bottom is in any of my pairings, and I won't get into the gritty details since this post should remain sfw but does a freaky, emotionally unavailable man like Whit ever truly submit if he does bottom? That man was born to top if only because he is surrounded by a sea of bottoms. I'll tell my friend with the ryoma pfp that you like our convos, I'm sure it'll give him a laugh.
Since you want to remain anon to not appear impolite, I won't tag this in the main tag, but I'll take note that innumerable faces is reread! Also haha, wdym anon fic?(whistles innocently...) I suppose I do have a distinctive style huh? I'm not sure I can do anything with it because that would require me to claim it, but please know that I truly am honored by your kind words!
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studentinpursuitofclouds · 2 years ago
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Due to a glitch in Tumblr (thank you very much, for fuck's sakes), the question was posted as a private message, can't return it. but thanks to @mazal22 , for whom I wrote the answer and was able to copy my notes. Bless your heart 🙏🙏🙏
Question: "I came up with a brilliant idea.. how about headcanons with bachelors and bachelorettes with a farmer who has a young brother/sister? That they look after him and they're just cute? Wild? Have some magic? I honestly don't know but think this just cute"
I decided to write in a new format, but still not sure. Because I couldn't decide whether to write short stories, a regular headcanon, or as a shitpost. In the end, everything was mixed together like in a salad. But anyway, I hope you like it)))
Be warned, this post is very long... Like wow
SDV and SVE bachelors:
Alex:
Oh, a new fan of the future athlete? Does they want an autograph or something?
Mmm? Raise that bench? Sure, not a problem! Now that heavy stump? With ease! Want to see what heavy things I can lift next? Something else? Lewis car? Hah, no probl-
"Alex, put my vehicle down!"
Alex is ok with the kid running around.
He notes to himself that it is quite brave and responsible of the Farmer's side to take care of the younger sibling and run the farm at the same time.
Sometimes he treats the child with ice cream from the kiosk in the summer.
Falls into a stupor if the child says that they believes in him that he will become a sports star.
...
If one of the tourists offends this kid, he will deal with Alex too, and not just with the angry Farmer.
Sam:
Sam became like a big brother to the Farmer's sibling.
He will definitely introduce them to Vincent so that they befriend and play together.
Buys them ice cream and gives them a ride on his skateboard.
Sometimes rolls them on his shoulders if they ask.
Vincent gets a little jealous and now Sam has two kids on his shoulders
It's not hard to guess that they all fell to the ground.
Sam doesn't mind watching the kids if the Farmer is too busy.
Best brother material!
Elliott:
Waking up in the morning, Elliott decided to take a walk and get some fresh air. He did not look out the window, knowing that the weather would be fine today. But in vain.
Around his house is a wall of sand.
"Your realm will soon fall before my sand army. Surrender, king of the elves."
Elf? Who is this child?
Ah, that's Farmer's sibling.
Well, Elliott understands a little about theatrical art, why not play along with the kid.
He always plays along with the siblings when they play games like this. The little one got talent, you could send them to art school, Farmer!
Allows them to braid his hair if the child asks. Just please don't pull his hair too hard!
Elliott is like a big thoroughbred noble dog: he will endure all the antics of children and will never bark.
Shane:
Despite his rudeness to the Farmer at the first meeting, he is neutral towards their sibling.
The chaotic younger sibling of the chaotic Farmer... Shane isn't sure if it's worth introducing them to Jas.
But children are children, so Jas and Farmer's sibling managed to become friends anyway.
Shane doesn't mind.
He and Farmer also began to communicate more, as two singe parents.
Although at the same time, Shane claims that he is a useless godfather and guardian.
"Uncle Shane is lying, Mr./Ms. Farmer."
"Shush, Jas."
Both Shane and Farmer now need to make sure the two kids don't get into trouble together.
Sebastian:
Acts like an awkward uncle.
How to communicate with children?
...
Do you like frogs?
Sebastian will show them his little terrarium, and will be happy if Farmer's sibling is excited about the amphibians.
He will also show his exclusive collection of comics.
Sebby, of course, is constantly on social networks, but he did not expect the child Naruto running around him.
They made Sebastian laugh, although he thought that nothing in this world would make him laugh.
Total chaos, but Sebastian is pretty cool with that.
Secretly too, Naruto runs with the sibling if they ask to join.
The Farmer caught Sebastian during this run. Busted!
Harvey:
The Farmer's sibling is a frequent visitor to the clinic.
Oh, nothing serious, just scratches on their knees and bruises on their arms. Children often run without looking under their feet and this child is no exception.
Always gives them sugar-free candy after sanitizing their scratches.
Sometimes the sibling just walks into the clinic to say hi to the uncle doctor.
Sometimes brings gifts for the doctor.
From an older sibling - vegetables and fruits.
Sometimes from themself - a cool shell or dirt.
Harvey doesn't know how to react to this. But thank the child anyway.
Victor:
He also acts like an awkward uncle (behind Sebastian in first place), but knows what to do with an energetic child when the Farmer is busy.
He has a lot of video games, what do you want to play?
Wait, they want to play a bridge simulator? They think this is an interesting game?
This is now Victor's sibling. Deal with it, Farmer.
Confused when a child does something chaotic but will support them (unless it's something dangerous, of course!).
Victor is confused, but he got the spirit. I give him 8/10 as brother/uncle material.
Lance:
Lance doesn't know what surprised him the most: the presence of a child in the Adventurers' guild, or their requests to show "fire in the palm of your hand."
He turned his head towards Marlon with a questioning look.
"Farmer's sibling. They asked to look after the kid for an hour while they clear the caves of monsters."
Oh, they have sibling?
Still, Lance gave in to the child's requests and formed a small fire sphere in his right hand.
"Awesome! See what I can"
They formed a similar sphere in their palms, but the elements of ice.
Hold on, what?
Although, remembering the event with the Farmer on Ginger island and learning about magic relics, Lance is not so surprised.
"Two talented young and chaotic mages, that's more of a headache for Magnus" Marlon thought as he watched it all.
"Indeed" Lance agrees and smiles.
Magnus:
Please don't touch this. Don't touch that either. Those books are very old, be careful! Please put the mushrooms back, he needs them for potions. For heaven's sake, stay out of his cauldron!-
Yoba, why does Magnus suffer so much.
First, Camilla with that ridiculous nicknames, blasted woman! Then Morgan almost burned down his tower, and then the Farmer and Junimos do something without warning the wizard.
And now this child. Child with magic. A walking chaos and troublemaker.
With magic and desir- put this potions back! - desire to poke their nose everywhere.
And yet, the child is kind, gets along well with Morgan, and is very talented, and...
No, don't touCH THOSE POTIONS-!
Somebody kill him.
SDV and SVE Bachelorettes:
Abigail:
At first she avoided the child. She is not a babysitter.
Then Farmer's sibling became interested in one of his older sibling's professions.
And saw Abigail again, asked if she was an adventurer too. They also want to become a warrior, and as cool as the Farmer and her.
Abby is now informally the child's mentor. No buts.
She realized that they are quite fun to be with, and they also love video games, another plus.
Abby will show them the cool crystals she found in the mines.
The child tried to bite off a piece of quartz.
Are they definitely not Abigail's distant relative, another "just taste the gem" lover?
But seriously, don't eat rocks please.
Penny:
Another young mind in her class.
Penny is very happy about the addition to her group.
Although this means more work with materials for the preparation of the school curriculum.
They are very smart and educated.
Although they give Penny a heart attack every time they climb a tree or get too close to a river bank.
Penny is like a mother hen, she doesn't let anyone go far.
She always helps them if they have learning difficulties.
Like the other children, she escorts the Farmer's sibling home.
The child always brings a beautiful and juicy apple to the young teacher. And sometimes a whole basket of apples.
Maru:
If you have problems with maths, Maru will help them.
Do you want to see the robots she makes?
Can I make the robot say something? Of course!
Makes a robot to... curse?
...
So, how old are they?
(Secretly also wants to give the robot such a function, but her father will not get it).
Gave them a couple of times to look through the telescope. With joy, she answers what kind of stars and planets they are.
"Aunt Maru, help build Lego"
Oh, with her, sibling will gather a separate civilization.
Teach them scientific puns.
Leah:
Leah's house door is now frequently knocked on.
"Aunt Leah, show me your new paintings, they are beautiful".
Well, how can Leah say no?
If the Farmer is busy then she can look after their sibling.
Mostly they are in nature.
Paints and clean sheets - and let the child create a miracle.
Sometimes they walk through the forest, where Leah shows them which berries are edible and which are poisonous.
Very proud of them if they already know.
She gets a good mood, and a basket of vegetables in gratitude from the Farmer - the day was a success.
Haley:
Haley is quite polite towards children, even if they are as chaotic as the Farm Relative.
Doesn't get mad at them even if they accidentally stained her clothes.
Periodically takes random photos of this running child.
It turns out very funny, you can make a good meme from this pictures.
And why not do it? But only of the Farmer themself and their sibling will allow it.
Now the kid is the star of the Internet.
Chaos of the Valley
Once she received a sunflower from them.
Haley will never forget this touching gift.
Scratch out the eyes with his new manicure to any bully who dares to offend them.
Try her, bitch.
Emily:
Always glad to see Farmer and their sibling at home.
She usually spoil the child with healthy sweets like pastille or sugar-free marmalade.
Emily can sew anything for them.
Do you want to be a pirate? Or an astronaut? Or maybe a vampire? Oh, or make a dinosaur costume.
Believe me, she is hung up on sewing. The main thing is to find a reason and time.
Can teach dancing or aerobics if the sibling asks.
He will tell you how to read a horoscope correctly.
Sibling will one day show her the magic in their palms.
Ah, Farmer! They are a wizard!
They are what?
Claire:
Please, child, Claire is trying to work. She is so tired
Don't ask her too many questions.
Where are their parents?
Ah, here they are. Well, not parents, but brother/sister, a new Farmer. The Farmer explained to their sibling that they should be well-mannered.
"Oh, okay. Sorry ms Claire".
Before and after work, she sees this child, but they are no longer clingy.
They greet her politely and move on.
They often give Claire dandelions they find and say she has a beautiful hair color.
A little angel.
They immediately cheer up Claire if she is depressed.
Given that the farm is very close to the bus stop, such meetings happen often.
Sometimes Claire treats the child to fresh apricots and apples that her neighbors gave her.
Sophia:
Oh hey.
...
How can Sophia talk to them?
Do you want to watch something cool on TV? I have anime, anime and... animal documentaries. Oh, and I also have anime.
With great pleasure, she will show them her cosplay.
Receive a small soft toy from the child as a gift.
"your toys will make another friend"
oh it's so cute
"And you have pretty hair like bubblegum. I like it."
Sophia, stop crying, you're scaring the child.
Do they love grampleton orange chicken as much as Sophia? And love anime?
Did someone say Sophia was an only child? Nothing like that, now she has a younger brother/sister.
Olivia:
Olivia is just like that grandmother who always spoils the children and gives them too much pocket money.
True, Olivia is not a grandmother, but a milf good looking middle-aged woman.
Spoils them to the point of impossibility, because they are so cute.
Even if the Farmer grumbles a little that she spoils them too much.
If a sibling comes to visit, they won't leave until they've eaten.
I'm telling you, she is like granny.
Olivia will show them an album of old photos of her family.
There's children's books in her library somewhere, if they're interested.
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tehmichi · 1 year ago
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Massages and Happy Endings - Part 2 - Beautiful
Notes: I wrote this back a few months ago, and I went over it a little now to touch it up. Hope you enjoy it! Can be read as a female reader insert. (Also, I'm new to posting fics on tumblr. pls forgive formatting errors) Part 1
Tags: Body worship, praise kink, cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, p in v smexy times, female ejaculation
Gaz had been a little nervous since the night before. While he was excited at the idea of getting a long overdue massage, he was worried about it being too much work for Stella. It’d been a good few years since his last one, so he was certain there were was going to be a lot of pent-up tension to work through. 
Stella disappeared that morning after breakfast and didn’t come back until after lunch. She’d returned with a few bags of things and assured everyone she’d eaten before coming back. Right after that, she disappeared into the med bay and requested to not be bothered until Gaz’s appointment time.
He knocked on the door shortly before three. 
“Come in, it’s unlocked,” Stella’s voice called from the other side. Gaz turned the knob and stepped in, surprised at how the base medical wing had been transformed. Soft music played through a small speaker, while the room was adorned with dimmed lights and candles. 
“Wow,” Gaz said, impressed. 
“You can strip behind the curtain and get in the bed when you’re ready,” Stella said from her desk. Her back was turned towards him as she read on her tablet. 
“Underwear?”
“Your choice. Though I will need to lower it slightly to massage your lower back.”
“Alright,” Gaz said, seeing the curtain. “Music’s nice.” 
“It’s one of those weird lo-fi stations on youtube,” Stella said with a giggle. “If you want anything else let me know. I’m not too fond of those Zen music stations. The singing bowls distract me,” she continued as Gaz started to take off his clothes. He chuckled at her admission, feeling a little more at ease. 
“Thanks for doin’ this for us, Stella,” Gaz said as he finished removing the last of his clothes. 
“Of course. You all deserve it after all the shit we’ve been through these last few months.” 
“Agreed,” Gaz said as he climbed onto the bed. 
“Do you want me to start with your back?”
“Yes, please,” Gaz answered. 
“Okay. Any area, in particular, you want me to focus on?”
“My shoulders.” 
“I feel like that’s what all of you are going to ask,” Stella chuckled. 
“Probably,” Gaz said, laying down and covering himself as much as possible. “I’m settled.” 
“Alright,” Stella replied. Gaz heard her set down the e-reader before slowly walking toward him. “Close your eyes, relax, and it’s okay if you fall asleep,” she said. Gaz heard a bottle open before the smell of coconut and almond invaded his senses. “I’m going to start on your legs and slowly work my way up. After that, I'll ask you to flip over. Deal?”
“Yes,” Gaz answered as he felt the blanket being lifted up on his left leg. Her hands were warm as she started working through his foot first before reaching his calf, applying gentle pressure as she massaged the muscle. Gaz groaned as she continued forth up to his thigh, feeling knots coming undone with minor pressure and pain. “Fuck,” he groaned as Stella undid a particularly stubborn knot mid-thigh. 
“Good?” Stella asked softly. 
“Yes,” Gaz breathed. 
“Moving onto your right leg,” Stella said, covering him up before moving around the table. “Is the oil good?”
“Yes,” Gaz answered, closing his eyes. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome,” Stella said as she resumed massaging him. The calming tunes helped as he melted under her hands. After she finished with his right leg and covered him up, Stella moved the blanket down to get to his back. “Pressure okay?” 
“Yes,” Gaz breathed, coming back from his nearly asleep trance. 
“Let me know if it’s too much. This is going to take me a while.” 
“Will do, Stella,” Gaz said as he heard the bottle opening once more. Her hands returned as she started with his lower back, varying in pressure. As she moved he could hear small little grunts and sighs as she worked on him. 
“Jesus,” she whispered. 
“What?” 
“Your back is absolutely wrecked. This is going to hurt.”
“Can’t be worse than a bullet.” 
“You’d be surprised, Kyle,” Stella said, finding a particularly stubborn muscle. Gaz tensed at the sound of his name coming from her lips instead of his callsign. 
“Fuck!” Gaz cried, now fully understanding what she meant. 
“If you want me to stop, I’ll stop,” Stella said, withdrawing her hands. 
“No, don’t,” Gaz insisted. 
“Alright. Your call,” Stella said, as she got back to the massage. Gaz kept breathing through it, feeling each knot come undone with some minor pain. “Doing okay there, Kyle?” 
“Yes,” Gaz replied, feeling more relaxed as Stella finally finished. He liked the sound of his name coming from her. It sounded sweet. She started working on his shoulders and arms, causing more pain to slip through while she massaged his pent-up stress away. “Oh, fuck,” Gaz groaned as another knot came undone. “Your hands are magic, luv,” he added. 
“Thanks,” Stella said, feeling the color rise to her cheeks. She cleared her throat to remind herself that now was not the time to fantasize. As she’d expected, Gaz’s arms were the hardest muscles to work with. After a long few minutes, she felt the stress come apart thanks to her hard work. “All that’s left is your neck and I’ll ask you to flip over, alright?” 
“Yes, luv,” Gaz said, moaning after he felt her hands on him again. Stella pressed her lips together as she worked, adding a little extra oil to her hands before getting back at it. Gaz closed his eyes again, relaxing under her hands and feeling the warmth radiating from her. 
“Flip over,” Stella whispered, as she released him. Gaz carefully flipped himself around, laying down on his back. He felt that he was semi-hard, something he was already somewhat used to from massages. “How are you feeling so far?” 
“Great,” Gaz answered, smiling slightly. Stella had stepped aside for a moment, grabbing some more of the massage oil. He took a moment to admire her under the dim lights. She was beautiful, dressed down in a loose shirt and tight shorts. Her hair had been swept up in a messy bun that rested atop the crown of her head. The team had all previously discussed how stunning they found her, and seeing her like this added fuel to fantasies he’d had previously. 
“Good,” Stella said as she set the bottle aside. “I’m glad,” she added, slowly walking over toward him once more with a bright smile. “I’m going to go over your arms again and finish at your stomach, alright?” 
“Yes, that’s fine,” Gaz answered as Stella grabbed his left arm and got back to work, starting with his hand. Her soft little noises returned, Gaz feeling every single one of them down to his length. She was focused, Stella’s expression mostly serious. Her plump lips slightly parted as she kept going down his arm. Gaz took the time to keep his eyes on her, admiring the little freckles that dotted her face, the small scar above her left eye from shrapnel a few months back, and the smallest smile that seemed to permanently rest on her face. “Luv?”
“Yeah?” Stella whispered, releasing his left arm and going around to grab his right. Gaz noticed the slight flush of her cheeks, finding her even more precious than before. 
“You’re very good at this.” . 
“Thanks,” she said softly. He could feel more comforting warmth radiating from Stella, grounding him in the present and the intimacy of this moment. Gaz closed his eyes and lost himself in the moment, wandering into some of his fantasies thanks to the added soundtrack. Visions of Stella under him as he fucked her good, feeling her soft skin under his lips as he kissed every inch of her, those sweet little sounds that were setting him on fire and causing him to get harder under the blanket. “I’m almost done,” Stella said softly, startling him back to reality. 
“Shit,” Gaz said, opening his eyes and seeing his new problem. “I’m sorry, Stella,” he said, looking from his painfully throbbing length to her. 
“Gaz, this is one of my side gigs when I’m not on deployment, I’m used to that,” Stella said, still working on his stomach. 
“It’s not because of the massage,” Gaz said, swallowing nervously. Stella pulled back, her cheeks flushed once more. 
“Oh,” she said, struggling to find her next words. “Um, okay,” she said, swallowing nervously. 
“I can leave if you-”
“No, it’s fine,” Stella said quickly. She was avoiding his gaze, more focused on the tented erection under the blanket. 
“Stella?” Gaz asked, slowly sitting up. 
“Sorry,” she apologized, panting. 
“Where did you go, luv?”
“The same place you probably did,” she answered, finally looking at him. 
“You’ve thought about me?”
“Yes. All of you.” 
“Oh?”
“I’m one woman in a team of six very attractive men and I can’t bring a fucking toy on deployment,” Stella mumbled. “I’ve seen plenty, and over this whole time, I’ve built considerable connections with all of you. Attraction followed right after that.” 
“All at once or…?”
“No, not all at once. I prefer the intimacy of one on one. Have not had more than that,” she said, avoiding Gaz’s eyes as she felt the tension in the room starting to spark. 
“We’ve all thought about you,” Gaz admitted. 
“What?” Stella asked in disbelief. 
“Stella, you’re beautiful. Inside and out. We’ve all had fantasies about you but out of respect, none of us have dared to approach,” Gaz answered. Stella slowly walked over toward him, swallowing nervously. “You’ve taken care of us since this whole mess started. We all want to return the favor you’re doing for us this week. Would you let us?” Gaz asked. 
“You all like me that much?”
“Luv, you have no idea,” Gaz said. “Hell, last night we all agreed that unless you said or did something, we weren’t going to make a move on you.” Stella laughed nervously, still in disbelief. 
“If I say yes, each of you will give me a happy ending after your massage?” 
“In so many words,” Gaz said with a chuckle. “What do you say?”
“Sure, why the fuck not?” Stella said, noticing how his gaze darkened at her consent. “I wasn’t exactly done, Kyle.” 
“Yes, you are,” Gaz said, reaching out and wrapping his fingers around her wrist and pulling her toward him. “I’m relaxed enough.” 
“How long have you guys been thinking about this?” Stella whispered. 
“Months, luv,” Gaz admitted, releasing her wrist and grasping her by the neck gently. “Months.” 
“Wow,” she whispered, still stunned this was happening. “All of us are in for a fun week, aren’t we?”
“Yes, we are,” Gaz said, guiding her down to his lips in a kiss. He pulled back slightly, watching how Stella slowly opened her eyes and smiled. “Beautiful,” he whispered. Stella giggled, climbing onto the bed. “Please tell me you have condoms in here.” 
“Current IUD,” Stella said. “Last partner was years ago. I’ve only used toys or my fingers since.” Gaz growled at her words, feeling his length twitch. 
“You’re going to be full of us by the end of the week,” he said huskily. 
“Fuck,” Stella breathed. Gaz chuckled darkly, claiming her lips in a searing kiss. Stella quickly grabbed the hem of her shirt, slowly tugging it upwards. She broke apart from Gaz’s lips to cast it aside, latching back onto his lips as Gaz reached over and undid the clasp of her bra expertly. It slid off her arms before he threw that aside, in the opposite direction of the candles. 
“Lie down, luv,” Gaz asked as he pulled back for air. Stella nodded, her lust driving her wild as Gaz lifted the sheets off the bed and gave her room to do as asked. “Gods, you’re stunning,” he whispered, cupping her left breast before taking the right one in his mouth. Stella gasped at the contact, moaning as his tongue swirled the soft nub, bringing it to a peak. 
“Oh, fuck,” Stella gasped as Gaz switched his mouth from one mound to the other. Her soft pants and moans were sweeter as he kept building her up slowly. He released her breast and slowly trailed his fingers down to the hem of her shorts and underwear, finding her slick with arousal. 
“How long have you been this wet, sweetheart?” Gaz whispered after releasing her peaked nipple. 
“A bit,” she admitted, panting. “Talking about how much you all have wanted me helped. And uh…that little wild thought I had earlier too.” 
“This cunt is goin’ to get so much attention from us,” Gaz said as his fingers carefully circled around her clit. “Tonight, it’s mine,” he growled, sliding a finger inside of her. 
“Yes,” Stella gasped, a soft whimper escaping her. 
“Don’t be quiet, luv,” Gaz encouraged her, placing soft kisses up her chest until he reached the pulse point on her neck. A second finger joined the first, filling her up further. Sweet pleas escaped her lips as she was built higher. Months of yearning, finally being fulfilled, With each curl of Gaz’s fingers, her release drew nearer. “That’s it,” he panted onto her neck, inserting a third finger. She bucked against him, gripping him by the arm as she came, digging her nails to ground herself as his name escaped her. “Beautiful,” Gaz breathed into her ear as she slowly came down from her high. 
“Oh, Kyle,” she panted. 
“I want to taste you, that alright?”
“God, yes,” Stella moaned. “I love being eaten out.” Gaz smirked, placing a chaste kiss on the corner of her lips as he withdrew his fingers. 
“Thank you,” he whispered, leaving soft kisses as he lay Stella flat on her back and continued downward. In one swift movement, her shorts and underwear joined the rest of her clothes on the flooer as Gaz positioned himself at the apex of her thighs. He licked along her slit, groaning at her taste. “Sweet, just like you, luv,” he said, placing a soft peck on her right thigh. “I want to hear you enjoyin’ yourself. Let them listen, they know what this means.” 
“That-that’s the hottest thing anyone’s ever said to me,” Stella admitted with flushed cheeks. 
“You’ll be hearin’ that all week,” Gaz said with a smirk, nipping at the plush flesh of her thigh. 
“Don’t tease me,” Stella whimpered.
“I’d never, luv,” Gaz said, kissing his way slowly to her folds. His tongue darted between, using delicate licks to savor her taste before dipping his tongue inside of her. Stella moaned at the welcome intrusion, gasping as Gaz’s thumb slowly circled her clit. Another whimper escaped her lips as Gaz withdrew his tongue from her core and released the pressure on her clit, his mouth arriving at her sensitive bundle of nerves and lightly sucking on it. 
“Fuck!” Stella mewled, panting as Gaz built her up. Stella gripped the sides of the bed, arching her back as ripples of pleasure kept coursing through her. “Kyle,” she moaned, whimpering as she felt another orgasm drawing nearer. She squirmed beneath him, riding his tongue measured movements. The feel of his tongue and mouth were driving her wild, nothing else mattered right now but Kyle taking care of her in the way she was craving. Stella cried out her second orgasm in a loud cry of his name, squirting all over his face. The sargeant lapped up all of it, groaning at the taste as he licked her clean. “Oh God,” Stella panted. 
“Feelin’ good?”
“Yes. And I’ll be better once you fuck me,” Stella answered. 
“Our gorgeous girl,” Kyle said, removing himself from her center and placing a soft kiss on her stomach. She let out a soft giggle as she slowly sat up. Gaz carefully wrapped an arm around her neck, angling her face towards him to capture her lips in a kiss as he positioned himself at her entrance. He slowly worked his way in, groaning at the way her walls gripped him. Stella’s soft little grunts returned, fulfilling his earlier fantasy as they sounded better in real life as he filled her. Kyle sighed once he was fully sheathed, giving himself and Stella a moment to collect themselves. 
“Fuck,” she panted. “I forgot how good this feels,” she moaned. He started slow, savoring the feeling of being inside of her. 
“You feel so good, luv,” Kyle groaned, cunt-drunk and moving faster. He tightened the hold around her neck, keeping his eyes on her. Her cries of ecstasy were music to his ears, and knowing he was the cause brought a dark smirk to his lips as he slammed into harder. The way she could barely speak, only chanting his name over and over again as Kyle kept pushing into her with fervent need. Stella came loudly, clenching around his length as she released herself all over him, adding more wet friction to their union. “That’s so fuckin’ hot, Stella,” he grunted, the sounds of his wet thrusts overpowered by her blissful sounds. 
“Ah, ah,” Stella whimpered, her voice going up a pitch. “
“Me too, luv,” he grunted. 
“Harder,” Stella urged. That was the only word she could form, rendered speechless. He did as asked, no longer holding back. With a long-drawn-out moan of his name, she came once more. Kyle groaned out his own release as Stella’s walls tightened around him, taking everything he was willing to give. 
“So good, luv, you did so good,” Kyle encouraged with delicate whispers as they came down. He lowered himself down to kiss her, whispering soft praises as he heard her breathing steady. “How are you feelin’?”
“Tired,” Stella breathed into his lips. Kyle chuckled, planting a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth and slowly untangling himself from her. 
“Wet naps?”
“Next to the speaker,” Stella answered softly. He found them quickly, going back toward Stella to clean her up. He took care of her in gentle strokes, watching as Stella recovered on the bed. 
“Did you fall asleep on me?”
“Almost,” Stella mumbled. Kyle chuckled, planting a soft kiss on her thigh. 
“Want one of us to bring you dinner?”
“Yes, please,” Stella answered. He straightened up, looking for water for her. It was a short walk to the med bay fridge, where he found a bottle for her. 
“Luv, drink some water,” Kyle said softly. Stella groaned as she sat up, taking the bottle from his hands and drinking from it. “Thank you,” he whispered, placing a soft kiss on her forehead.
“Thank you, Kyle,” Stella said softly, smiling before taking another swig of water. He started to get dressed, keeping his eyes on the dazed female on the massage bed. 
“Eat all your dinner and rest up.” 
“I will,” Stella said, smiling. “You’re not going to tell me who’s coming in tomorrow?”
“Nope. Where’s the fun in that? Now that you’ve said yes to us, we’re goin’ to make it even more fun by keeping the mystery.”
“Can’t wait,” Stella grinned. Kyle walked over to her, tucking his fingers under her chin so she could look up at him. “This week is a fantasy come true.” 
“Indeed,” Kyle said, placing a soft kiss on her lips. “Take it easy, alright?”
“Yes, Kyle,” Stella beamed. He smiled back at her as he walked over to the door, unlocked it, and left the med bay. 
___________________________________________________________
Kyle stepped into the dining room to the entire team waiting for him. They all stared at him expectantly, eager to hear anything about how his afternoon had gone. Dinner was ready, various steaming plates were set out on the table, untouched. 
“I told them she said yes,” Soap said quickly. “They don’t believe me.” 
“You heard her?”
“Gods, yes,” Soap groaned. “I hate that it’s not my turn tomorrow.” 
“Wait, Soap isn’t kidding?” Alejandro asked. 
“No, he’s not. I told her to be as loud as she wanted, that you’d all know what that meant if you heard her,” Kyle answered. “She said yes.” 
“Fuckin’ hell,” Price said in disbelief. 
“Where is she now?” Ghost asked. 
“Resting. She needs dinner,” Kyle answered. Simon immediately sprang to action, grabbing a plate and filling it with food. “Thanks, Ghost.” 
“Of course. I’ll make sure she gets to bed,” he added, making sure he had enough. “I’ll be back later, save me some,” Simon said, quickly heading toward the med bay. Once he stood before the door, he knocked lightly. 
“Come in,” Stella’s voice called out through the door. Simon carefully opened it with his free hand, admiring the dimly lit room and the soft music. He found her on the massage bed, relaxed. “Si,” she said softly, smiling. 
“Gaz told us you said yes,” he said softly. 
“I did,” she replied, slowly sitting up, clutching the blanket as she covered herself up with it. “You’re not going to tell me when you’re up?”
“No,” he chuckled. “We all promised to keep it a secret.” 
“Jerk,” she giggled. 
“Here, dinner,” Simon said, offering her the plate of food. 
“Can you get me my shirt?”
“Of course,” Simon answered. He set the meal down at her desk, finding her discarded clothing items around the room. “Someone was eager.” 
“Simon, it’s been years since the last time I had sex,” Stella scowled. He chuckled, giving her what she’d asked for. 
“I’ll go get you more water,” he said, turning around to give her privacy to redress. 
“Thank you,” Stella said. Simon turned around with a new bottle of water for her. “Are you going to keep me company while I eat?”
“Yes, and that you get to bed.” 
“I’m not a child.” 
“No, but we want to take care of you and make sure you rest,” he said softly, helping Stella off the massage bed so she could sit at her desk and eat. “Just like you do for us every day.” 
“That’s something similar to what Kyle said earlier.” 
“Because we all agree,” Simon said, removing his mask finally and watching her eat. 
“I need to wash the sheets,” Stella said between bites. 
“I’ll take care of it. You know I’m the one who sleeps the least.” 
“Hopefully, you’ll be able to get some rest at some point this week.” 
“I do too, star,” Simon said, gathering up the sheets. “I’m going to put this to wash and be right back.” 
“Okay,” Stella said smiling as she kept eating. “I’m not going anywhere.” 
“Good,” Simon said, putting on his mask. “Finish that.” 
“I will, Si,” Stella said, rolling her eyes. 
“Good girl,” he said, noticing how a blush quickly built on her cheeks. “Figured you were one to enjoy praise,” he teased as he opened the door. Stella narrowed her gaze at him, growling slightly. 
“Shut up.” 
“You know you like the sound of my voice, dove.” 
“It was one time.”
“You fell asleep to me reading you a book twice,” he teased her. “Once is a coincidence, twice is a pattern.” 
“Fine,” Stella groaned. “I like the sound of your voice. Especially when it’s unobstructed.”
“Wait until you hear it in your ear praisin’ you for how good you take my cock.” 
“Fuck, Si,” Stella groaned. He chuckled darkly as he left the med bay to start the load of laundry. 
His turn couldn’t get here soon enough.
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morgue-xiiv · 2 years ago
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@hoskky asked:
Wow, that's what I call express IT support! Wish the guys at my workplace reacted as quickly as you do lol. Thanks, I'll keep using "Titus" when looking for his dialogue. In this instance, it was to see if he'd ever said (or tried to say) the word "circumstancial" and for a split second I thought that the error was due to there being "cum" in the word; then I realised what a ridiculous thought that was, given the content of the game ahaaa. Stupid social media censors sure wire your brain a certain way. I think I read that you weren't updating the desktop database anymore so I've been using On Air, but if you think there are advantages to the desktop version, I'm not opposed to installing it. Does it have a means of identifying content that was cut from the game, by any chance? [some text here removed for privacy]
Oh, you just got lucky, I'm afraid! I forget to come on Tumblr a lot but you sent an ask while I was online. It's not express until I actually fix it, no?
OH MY GOD, circumspect... the Scumthorpe problem, lol. I HATE how the damn censored internet warps my mind into feeling like any mildly risque content is a crime I need to cover up. It fucks culture up so much. DON'T WORRY, you can and should use the FAYDE to look up "anal acrobats".
Yeah, I'm not updating the FAYDE desktop PROGRAM any more, since I don't think many people use it. But the databases should be up to date! FAYDE-on-Air doesn't let you just pick into the database and query it directly, the desktop one does. I think the FAYDE-on-Air has most of the useful features by now. If you already managed to extract the game data into a database yourself, you wouldn't need to. Or... if ... is SQL a learned skill or are people born knowing it? I can't remember a time before I learned it so I am horribly out of touch. Well SQLite browser is pretty good for looking at databases even if you don't have 1337 SQL skillz!
Sadly it's just really hard to work out what content is inaccessible as there's no consistent format. All they do is make the tree dependent on a condition that can never come true… so actually, you'll be able to ID removed content with your variables analysis faster than I could!
I didn't respond to your ask directly in case you didn't want me to splash the contact details part, but I love replying to asks so.... it's inescapable.
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eofoc · 2 months ago
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hi! i saw on oc-center that you have mentally ill queer vampire ocs and those are some of my favorite! i briefly looked through their profile posts (GORGEOUS layout by the way. wow) and i'm really curious about them; do you have any story or world set up for them, or do they more exist like Conceptual Dolls in the mind? (/not judgemental, that's basically how mine are hsbdcahcs so i just figured I'd ask!!)
is there anything you particularly love about them or any dynamics between them you'd like to talk about?? open prompt to infodump a little!!
HI!!!!!1 THANK YOU SO MUCH.. i love make silly little aesthetic layouts... (not very tumblr proficient yet when it comes to that but. i will get there)
answer under the cut because i went crazy
they do have a whole world and story set up!!! :D with a pretty..extensive worldbuilding actually (jhbhads)!!!! i dont talk much about the story/plot because sadly i am a bit insecure and also. it changes all the time. but its There!!! id love to talk about it here in the near future!!!!!
i did just make a . google doc combining all of the worldbuilding i have so far :] it goes into detail about the history of the world and what vampires are in this universe!!! you can find it here
i didnt format it yet (i plan to make it a some sort of masterdoc with complete profiles as well) but. it does have the most recent info i think hehe
theres a lot of things i love about them.. kind of because they all carry a part of me / my experiences in a prettyi d abstract way :] so theyve became very special to me over time!!!!! ive poured a lot of love and own experiences into them ... which does have its cons too jjdshjsd
i honestly like all of the dynamics.. but. i feel like orifiel and mischa make me the Craziest overall for story reasons (which are only vague ideas for now) ..
mostly because theyre two lonely people that ironically are fundamentally very similar but also very different. they are really based on polar opposites and it makes me enjoy them a lot.. mischa who grew up alone and unwanted by his family obsessed over the religious unreachable figure that orifiel was to him and grew up with so many emotions regarding him - love, hate, obsession, admiration, rage, feeling of injustice and jealousy... all without having even met him JKSDKJD
and then theres orifiel, who despite growing up as an object of affection never really got a chance to pour his all into one person.. he grew up with a very warped view of love and affection (it being one-sided and obsessive) and. mischa feeds into it for selfish reasons. and. jesus i dint even know what to say here because my brain is FRIED
orifiel is a very selfish person too in some aspects so ultimately. theyre two lonely selfish nonbinary FREAKS who dont know how a healthy relationship looks like.
at one point in the plot (bad ending?) i have this. thing planned in mind. mischa almost dies since a certain plan goes wrong - and orifiel literally sees Red. like despite all his reason and rationality he resorts to a desperate speedrun of human experiments - the thing that is the core trauma of his childhood :] fellas is it gay to bring back your boy best friend to life but you dont even recognize him anymore . he doesnt even feel human anymore but you cannot bring yourself to lose him . at the same time you wont grant him the mercy of freeing him from the life of being a mindless beast like Omggg whats wrong with you
another bad timeline? ending? thing? VERY VAGUE THOUGH. i had in mind was mischa just. going Wrong at some point . where to guarantee his safety he decides that he must pretend to be the enemy (part of the Church)... hes a wholeass vampire mind you. the church fucking HATES vampires. well . his religious trauma goes bonkers at some point in this timeline and he ends up blackmailing orifiel into increasing the power of the church so that his position of power is guaranteed . hes a bit of a selfish asshole but i accept him anyways .
i feel like i talked a lot about mischa here. but orifiel. jesus Christ girlie. he doesnt even know it but hes self-destructive to an absolutely crazy degree. letting the church do whatever the fuck it wants to do with me ;;3 i have no identity and no name btw ;333 everything is okay and fine. at the same time he also thinks hes the greatest person and entity ever so like idk whats his deal i want to eat him alive
once again brain fried . i can talk so much about threm with a specific question or a prompt though i Promise .
the yap here is fucking crazy im so sorry damn
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consulaaris · 6 years ago
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selcouth for your exile?
selcouth- unfamiliar, rare, strange, and yet wonderful
She didn’t know when it started- the strange little flutterings in the depths of her chest, the trembling of her fingertips, the thoughts that drifted where she knew they shouldn’t. Attachments were forbidden for a Jedi, and the Force knew they’d destroyed her before... yet Katyan couldn’t quite bring herself to care.
It had been such a long time since she’d felt like this, since small smiles appeared so freely from her lips and laughter filled every nook and cranny of the Ebon Hawk. The feeling of belonging warmed her to her very core. She had friends again, people who cared about her in more ways than she could possibly imagine. So what if perhaps she felt a little different about her pilot? Surely it was just the newness, the rarity of the sensation that all but consumed her thoughts.
But she was lying to herself, of course. Again.
(It’s oh-so-difficult to escape such a pattern of deceit, especially when one’s very identity is built on it.)
Katyan had never truly explored her feelings before, or at least had never been given the opportunity to do so. She’d noted fleeting attractions of romantic and sexual nature on many an occasion, but this was... different. Atton Rand was different.
She wasn’t entirely sure she liked that.
In truth, the newness of it all terrified her. The change terrified her. So many times in the past had the world been seemingly ripped from under her feet that she could hardly bring herself to face each new day for fear of what it might bring. Consistency, routine; those were her tethers to the world at hand. Without them she felt like she was drowning, floundering in a galaxy that had no space for a renegade Jedi traumatized by the actions of the past. That was how she’d survived in those long seven years since Malachor, and that’s how she’d continue on given the chance.
And yet those moments with Atton were strangely captivating. She couldn’t predict him; she never could. He was a wild card aboard her ship, a threat to her mental sanctuary, but despite it all she enjoyed the banter and the little pazaak games that filled much of their free time. She found herself seeking his company when she least expected it, and he seemed to return the favor. Each moment felt like a breath of fresh air, or perhaps a sweet stolen surreptitiously from the candy jar.
It was new and enticing and oh-so-wonderfully strange that she couldn’t bring herself to pull away. To Katyan it was almost like feeling the Force for that very first time, opening her eyes to a world she’d never really known existed... and while it was unfamiliar and frightening and uncertain, for perhaps the first time she reveled in it all.
So for now she lived in the moment, damning the consequences.
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moon-minghao · 7 years ago
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‘leave your lover’
anon requested: “ junhao with the prompt: "they said 'speak now or forever hold your peace' so i'm speaking up."
words: 1885
summary: “the girl is pretty. this, minghao can admit.
she is perfect for junhui, perfect in general, and when junhui introduces her to the boys, everything makes perfect sense: junhui is some sort of angel, surely, and so maybe his girlfriend has to be one, too.
(of course, there are some things that minghao won’t admit to. he won’t admit to the nights he’s spent looking in the mirror, staring at his sharp jaw and pale cheeks and thinking about how unpretty he feels, a masochistic sort of comparison)”
__________________________________________________
the girl is pretty. this, minghao can admit.
she has dark brown eyes and long black hair and her face is round, smooth and always blushing and she is all soft angles; her laugh is beautiful and her jokes are polite.
minghao can admit all of this.
she is perfect for junhui, perfect in general, and when junhui introduces her to the boys, everything makes perfect sense: junhui is some sort of angel, surely, and so maybe his girlfriend has to be one, too.
(of course, there are some things that minghao won’t admit to. he won’t admit to the nights he’s spent looking in the mirror, staring at his sharp jaw and pale cheeks and thinking about how unpretty he feels, a masochistic sort of comparison)
junhui tells minghao that he loves her.
he says it casually, offhandedly. they are all hanging out one day when she leaves to get herself another glass of water or juice or whatever, because obviously she doesn’t drink, and junhui watches her go and says “i think i’m in love.”
and minghao just says “i don’t blame you.”
(because, after all, she is celestial. and minghao is just a boy.)
they were both fresh out of college, then, and minghao was still trying to date mingyu. (which falls through; every single time). they were both fresh out of college and so painstakingly young, always exhausted from dancing through the week and partying on the weekends, and all minghao could do was pray that the girl breaks his best friend’s heart.
______
exactly four years after junhui says he is in love, he says he is engaged.
jeonghan claims to have seen it coming, wonwoo admires junhui for finally popping the question, seungcheol gets emotional, and junhui’s mother starts planning a wedding.
mingyu texts minghao. a simple text, no emojis or exclamation points, just three words. “are you alright?”
because of course, mingyu has known this entire time that minghao is head over heels for junhui. mingyu isn’t the most intelligent kid, but he sure knows how to read people. and so everyone is congratulating the soon-to-be groom and the soon-to-be bride and minghao is busy staring at his phone, feeling like an unwanted flower in the harshest of storms.
“no, of course i’m not, you idiot” he wants to say, or maybe just “no.” or maybe “no no no no no” like some child throwing a temper tantrum, angry and unfair.
but he doesn’t, instead he types: 
“of course ! i told you i already got over the cold i was complaining about. did you hear junhui’s news? i’m happy for him!! (●´ω`●)”
and mingyu may be concerned but he hates to pry, so he just responds with a “yes, i did!!” and he leaves it at that. he knows how quickly minghao turns mean, a defense mechanism that has been ingrained in the boy since they were children.
when they see each other again, though, there are dark circles underneath minghao’s eyes and he has lost weight that mingyu didn’t even know he had.
______
the wedding is on a saturday. junhui’s brother is best man and everyone is attending, bright and smiling.
minghao goes, set jaw and blue suit, not saying a word to anyone. he sits between mingyu and soonyoung and wishes he had brought his camera, if only to take pictures of the blooming trees through the stained glass window.
soonyoung and chan are holding hands as they wait for the ceremony to begin. it's a detail that almost makes minghao smile. if any of them are to have a happy ending, he would hope it would be the two of them.
“you look tired, hyung.” chan says in a soft voice.
“been working too hard.” minghao shrugs.
which isn’t entirely true; he has been working, he always is, spending long nights designing jackets or trousers with mingyu, but he has also been drinking straight vodka and sleeping with any girl who catches his eye.
and, of course, he has been thinking of junhui, which always makes him tired. a sort of sugary sweet, chest pain, comfortable tired. the same type of weariness that he has come to identify as love.
junhui looks nice in his tuxedo. his ink black hair is slicked back and he looks happy, as awkward as he always does but happy all the same. minghao smiles at him instinctively. junhui smiles back.
his fiancee looks lovely, too. her wedding dress is pure white and her curls frame her heart shaped face, something close to an ethereal debutant.
minghao doesn’t smile at her. she is looking at junhui with eyes full of unquestionable love and minghao supposes that makes two of them.
he scans the large room before the wedding officially starts. jeonghan, joshua and seungcheol sit in the very back row, deep in hushed conversation. jihoon couldn’t make it, so seokmin is ready with a smartphone in order to record everything, even if jihoon didn’t ask him to.
junhui’s parents are sitting in the very front row, looking proud and official and anxious, near the bride’s parents too.
the sheer amount of people makes minghao nervous. he sits in the middle of the crowd, positively unnoticeable. he likes it that way, a rainy cloud insignificant in the middle of such a sunny, momentous occasion.
the reverend clears his throat and everyone looks up. this is it, the very beginning, and he starts his speech as soon as the bride reaches the altar.
his speech is long winded, a droning thing, and just before the vows begin, the reverend turns to the crowd.
“should anyone here present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.”
______
xu minghao was always a quiet kid.
he never had many friends when he was little. he grew up to be harsh and logical and rather lonely. he moved to south korea from china when he was still just a lanky teenager, doe eyes and dyed blonde hair.
it was just him and his mother then, in a small apartment in seoul. he never really complained; xu minghao knew how to take what he could get. accept his fate.
the first real friend he ever had was seokmin, who introduced him to soonyoung, who introduced him to chan and junhui. minghao remembers it had been raining, an autumn day where everyone was cold and shivering and soonyoung had smiled wide and said, “these are my friends, i’ve told them all about you.”  
and minghao had said a simple greeting in response, nothing too fantastical, but junhui looked entranced just the same. (wen junhui was quiet, too, but he made up for whatever words he lacked through his actions, always so kind and affectionate.)
junhui and minghao get close, but enter some sort of torturous dance: whenever junhui moves forward, minghao moves back. he responds quickly and unenthusiastically to any of junhui’s advances. he doesn’t trust junhui when the boy says he likes him, and junhui figures he should just drop it.
minghao will blame no one but himself for the shattering of his own heart; this was self destruction at its finest.
(one time, minghao got sick.
he tried to make it through the entire school day with a high fever, but was sent home by fourth period. he slept until the afternoon, tormented by a pounding headache and nausea.  
when he woke up, junhui was sitting by his bed, gentle eyes and school uniform.
“your mother let me in.” he explains before minghao has to ask. the sick boy nods in response.
“i was worried about you, haohao.” he continues, then he leans towards minghao.
this part gets hazy in minghao’s recollection of the memory: some days, he believes - or, convinces himself - that junhui had reached over and pressed a hand against his head to check his temperature, and other days he is more than certain that junhui had pressed his soft lips to his forehead.
either way, minghao remained silent.
xu minghao is a worrier, always nervous about ruining a good thing with his words. xu minghao knows how to keep his mouth shut.)
______
so it must be fate, or destiny, or something stupid like that, that motivates minghao to stand up in response to the reverend’s words.
he stands up and immediately freezes. he can hear mingyu mutter “holy fucking shit” but it sounds far away. even the feeling of soonyoung’s hand, tugging forcefully on his suit jacket in the hopes to pull him back down to earth, can’t reach him.
everyone is looking at him. junhui is looking at him.
the reverend seems like he is about to say something, perhaps ask minghao what his reason is, but junhui turns to the older man and whispers, “can i have a moment to speak to him?” and so he just nods.  
the room is dead silent after junhui’s words. he sends an apologetic look towards his bride, then walks over to minghao’s row, and all but drags the younger boy out of the church.
it’s warm out, a perfect spring day, and minghao barely has time to adjust to the light before junhui grabs him by the shoulders and harshly shoves him against the side of the church. minghao lets out a gasp at the jolt of pain.
“what exactly do you think you are doing?” junhui asks. his voice is low and serious and he looks so angry, so stern and unforgiving that it makes minghao want to cry.
“he, uh, the man… the man said that if we had any objections, we should uh…”
“yes, minghao, i know what he fucking said. what i want to know, hao, is what the fuck you think you are doing. especially now, after all this time.”
and now minghao really is crying. the first time in my entire life where i tried to speak my mind and i’ve absolutely ruined everything. perfect. great. “i just, i just love you so much and i knew that if i didn’t speak now then i would have to take it to the grave and-”
junhui’s face softens. “what?” he asks sharply.
“i love you, wen junhui.” minghao cringes; his nose is running and his voice is shaky and here he is on junhui’s literal fucking wedding day, confessing his love like an over-excited fangirl. “but now i’ve fucked everything up and your bride is waiting for you and your parents are in there and…” he can’t speak anymore, not with how embarrassed he is.
“shh, hao hao.” junhui is wiping away minghao’s tears. he has lost all the edge in his voice. “it’s going to be alright.”
minghao looks up, confused and irritated. “don’t be nice to me. you should be angry. i deserve to get yelled at, junhui, i’ve ruined your wedding.”
“i would have ruined it anyways.”
“how could you have possibly done that?”
“well, generally weddings are ruined when the groom is still in love with his old friend.”
it takes a second to register. minghao pauses, about to ask junhui what fucking game he thinks he is playing. before he can, however, junhui has caught him in a kiss, lips pressed harshly against his, still wet from tears.
30 notes · View notes
thewertsearch · 3 years ago
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Asks compilation: 09/05
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God ok that actually sounds like it would work really well. John would be a huge McElroy fan, wouldn’t he?
I just looked up the Washington accent to compare it to Griffin’s, and wow, my mental voice for John is completely different. I probably have all the wrong accents for these characters in my head, since I don’t have a clue which accent maps to which state. 
At least we’re all in the same boat about not knowing Jade’s accent - unless we learn where Grandpa grew up later on, since she’d probably have picked up his.
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Brilliant! Yeah, no, I’ve been trying to nail down that font for ages.
Dammit, I just realized I could have inspected homestuck.com’s source >:(
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It narrowly edges out Gen 4, for me. D/P/Pt were great, but Black and White were the games which really perfected the formula. I honestly don’t think they should have gone 3D, but whatcha gonna do?
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Oh my god, of course there are. I’m going to rewatch that show some day and lose my mind, aren’t I?
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Hey, thanks for the ask! 
I thought about this back when I was first starting the blog. I dunno, though. You’re really not missing much - my live reactions aren’t nearly as coherent as the writeups - mostly just a lot of ‘oh my god, what?’ moments. I write more articulately than I speak. Trust me on this. 
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I’m honestly impressed you came up with something more headache inducing than the bogo algorithm, which for the uninitiated literally means ‘randomly shuffle a list until it’s sorted’. 
aw fuck we’re getting a bogo modus aren’t we
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I like Bogleech’s writing, especially his creature design reviews, but I could never get more than a handful of pages into Awful Hospital. I respect his commitment to the stereotypically ‘gross’ organic aesthetic, but it kind of just squicks me out. Plus, I dunno. The premise is really dark, but the comic seems to be a full-on comedy. The dissonance just doesn’t really work for me. 
Still, though. Pokéween is some of my favorite writing on the web. Check out his stuff. 
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I’ve never been super into horror. Mind you, I like having something to listen to when I’m out on a walk, and I’ve heard good things about the Magnus Archives, so maybe this is my opportunity to give it another chance?
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No, yeah, we have a winner. Step aside, Broderick.
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I have come to accept that Hussie is just really prone to making unintentional references. When Dave Strider is one of your primary characters, you probably can’t avoid constantly referencing pop culture - even, it seems, accidentality!
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The Queen is dead! everything has gone to shit! Long live Jack the Ascended!  
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Haha, I never considered that tumblr’s format does kind of resemble John and CG’s inverted conversations, in a way. When you reblog a connected pair of joke posts, you even have to make sure to reblog them backwards, or you’ll invert them! 
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Ah, indie devs. Heads, they’re legends, tails, they’re assholes. 
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I’ve never played it, but it’s been sitting in my steam library for months! If it’s anything like Celeste, I should have started playing it yesterday. Lore is pretty much the only thing Celeste is missing - not that it needs it. 
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Those giant Underlings are nothing compared to what you see in Pipecorp. This is just another day in the office for Harold P. Egbert. 
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Awesome! Yeah, I already see why the comic’s music is so popular. And considering we’ve got Toby ‘Leitmotifs’ Fox on the music team, these are all sure to return. 
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So what, it’s like, Act 6: Act 1? We’re going to start recursing?
Don’t lie to me, guys. This comic is a fractal, isn’t it? It goes on forever, the sub-acts shrinking into the infinitesimal. 
I know not what awaits me. 
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Six, right? Based on the above ask, there can’t be room for any more, unless they shrink dramatically after Act 6. 
I have no idea how many sub-acts there could be, though. Once you pop open that can of worms, you can’t easily close it. 
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Done! From now on, all theoryposts will be tagged #theories!
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Yeah, noted! I didn’t expect Homestuck to require the equivalent of waiting for the post-credits scene, but here we are?
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In what sense? The Trollslum showed up pretty soon after Jade’s intro, and CG chimed in up not long after. The sense I always got was that Hussie improvised a lot of the comic, but maybe the trolls were a particularly spontaneous addition?
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Liveblogging a liveblog! I can get behind that. Yeah, like I’ve alluded to before, I’d be having a very different experience with this comic if I wasn’t reading it in bite-sized chunks. 
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Thank you!! I’m really trying to convey the same feelings that I’m getting while I’m reading this comic. I’m glad it’s working!
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Honestly, my guessing technique is essentially just throwing theories at the wall to see what sticks. 
I usually have like, two or three explanations for a a given event in the comic, which means I can be eerily correct and ironically wrong about the same thing -  or ironically wrong twice over, as is probably more likely.
55 notes · View notes
thefanficmonster · 4 years ago
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Corpse’s Girl
Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)
Warnings: Bullying, Swearing, Derogatory Terms
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Summary: Y/N’s life as a regular college student is forever stripped away from her when her relationship with the famous YouTuber Corpse Husband is accidentally revealed during an online class of hers. How will she cope with the sudden spotlight and the unwanted attention, some of which crosses into bullying?
Requested by my amazing Tumblr friend @itsminniekat 🥰 She’s been reading and liking my works since day one and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. If you’re reading this, all I can say is thank you, darling. Thank you so much for sticking by my blog even when I posted some crappy fics. I’ll make sure this ain’t one of them. Love you with all my heart. ❤❤❤
P.S. - I named the mean character with my name so I hope no one who reads this has the same name. Wouldn’t want any of you feeling like the villain 😘
Who knew online class would be even more boring than being physically present for a lecture? Seriously, I find myself doing the weirdest of crap to entertain myself - like trying to balance a pen on the tip of my nose for example. I jot down some notes every now and then but that’s basically it. My mind can not fathom the concept on concentrating on whatever my professors are going on and on about. Well, full disclosure, I couldn’t concentrate even if I wanted to, especially with my boyfriend streaming in the other room.
He’s currently playing Among Us with his usual gaming squad. Listening to his input during the discussions, I can always tell when he’s lying. I honestly find it hilarious that his friends can’t pick up when he’s bullshitting them. I sometimes wonder if he has brainwashed them. And that’s one of the main reasons we don’t play Among Us together - he can’t lie to me. Not only do I pick up on his con with ease, but he always says he feels bad when he lies to me which is just the sweetest thing. Also, I refuse to play cause I’m shy. His friends are all well-known content creators and I’m a literal nobody. Every now and then I find myself wondering why Corpse is even with me. He’s always quick to push those thoughts out of my head and make sure they don’t return on a long notice, but they do interrupt my peace from time to time.
“Y/N, do you know?“ The sound of my professor saying my name takes me out of my eavesdropping of Corpse’s stream.
I panic, but quickly improvise, “Sorry, my internet is slow, you cut out for a second. What was the question?” I feel my face heating up, making me glad we are allowed to keep our cameras off.
“Question number 15 on page 82 in your textbook. Do you know the answer to it?“ My professor repeats himself, his tone annoyed.
I look down at the page that’s already opened in front of me. I let out a sigh of relief, seeing that the question is rather easy.
“Yeah, um, it’s...“ Suddenly, Corpse’s laugh reaches my room loud and clear. There’s no doubt my mic picked up the noise, especially since the door to my room is open.
The color drains from my face as I hurry to say the answer and remute myself. My eyes are wide as I stare at my screen, hoping no one will acknowledge that very recognizable laugh.
“OMG Y/N, are you watching a Corpse Husband stream in class?” One of the bitches in my class, Vy, speaks up, “Not a very goody-two-shoe move on your part, dear.” 
I purposely unmute my mic to mumble a quick ‘Shut up, bitch’ that somehow manages to fly under my professor’s radar and the class continues. It’s the first time something like this has happened and I’m not sure if I handled it properly or not.
The class ends shortly after, allowing me a sigh of relief as I disconnect from the meeting. 
“Fucking finally.“ I mumble to myself, leaning back in my desk chair. Tilting my head backwards, I see Corpse standing in the doorframe. I grin, not only because his presence itself makes me ten times happier, but also because he’s upside down from my viewpoint. “Well, hello there! How long have you been spying on me?“
He struts over to me, leaning his face over mine, “Long enough.” His lips linger above mine without any actual contact before he pulls away, allowing me to sit up straight and proper in the chair. “You still have classes?”
I nod my head while disappointedly rolling my eyes, “Yeah. One more. Shouldn’t be too bad since it’s English Lit. You’re done streaming?”
“Yeah, I just have some other things to do. I haven’t done a narration video in a while, I miss making that type of content.“ He plops down on my bed, running a hand through his messy black curls.
“Weren’t you recording some lines a few days ago?“ I frown as I try to recall if what I’m referring to actually happened or my brain is too fried to decipher reality from my bootleg perception of it. Online class, man - messes with your head like sleeping pills - makes you disoriented and exhausted with barely doing anything other than trying to wrap your brain around a lecture or two.
He hums affirmatively, “It’s not a finished project and I don’t even know if I’ll use those or rerecord them. I’ll have to listen to them again before I make a final decision.“
I tilt his chin upwards with my pointer finger, a gesture he has told me he finds very endearing, “I’m sure they’re great and you just refuse to be satisfied. Everything you do is great.“
He smiles a small, shy smile, his fingers gently wrapping around my wrist, holding my hand in place, “You’re biased. You like me too much to tell me when I do some bullshit.”
I scoff, “You know that isn’t true. If someone’s gonna kick your butt in formation, it’s gonna be me.“ I give him a quick kiss on the forehead before pulling away from him, “Go on, now. I have a class to attend. You distract me enough while you’re in the other room, I can only imagine how hard it’d be for me to focus if you were right by my side.“
He smirks, bowing a little as he makes his way out of the room, “You flatter me.”
I playfully roll my eyes, getting my headset back on as I tap the last class for the day. We have an assignment due to the start of the class which we’ll have to present if the professor approved of it. We basically had to write a psychoanalysis of a character from any book of our choice. I chose Heathcliff from ‘Wuthering Heights’ which is one of my favorite books of all time. I’m proud of what I wrote and the way I wrote it, but I’ve always barely scraped by with a B in this class, a B+ if I’m lucky, so I’ve never gotten any major credit, even when I put my 110% in the assignments and projects.
Well, color me surprised when the professor calls on me first to read my work, complimenting it on its detailed and specific nature. I get my printed assignment out in front of me and unmute myself.
“I wrote a psychoanalysis on for Heathcliff, a character from Emily Bronte’s novel ‘Wuthering Heights’.“ Just after I say this line, Corpse’s voice booms throughout the whole apartment, no doubt being picked up by my mic. It doesn’t sound like he’s actually talking, he can’t be that loud. I put two and two together when I recognize the lines he’s saying - the ones he recorded a few days ago. They’re coming from his computer speakers. He probably didn’t check the volume before playing back the recording.
I mute myself as quickly as possible, but it’s too late. The voice dies down as Corpse probably turned down the speakers.
My professor, who is already done with this lecture, just annoyedly remarks, her words overdosed with sarcasm: “Read your assignment and you can go back to whatever it is you are watching.”
“Wow, Y/N! Again?! Are you one of those crazy obsessed fans or something? Is Corpse Husband all you watch?“ This bitch is really poking a stick at me, huh? The only crazy obsessed fan here is her, and my friends but they are allowed. Little do all of them know, I am obsessed but not simply over a YouTuber. I’m obsessed with my boyfriend who just happens to be a YouTuber.
“No commentary, please.“ The professor scolds her, “Go on, Y/N.“
I finish reading without any other disturbances. The professor compliments my essay again when I’m done, the small incident at the beginning forgotten already. Well, not by everyone. One of my friends shot me a quick text to joke about it which only earned an eye roll from me.
My friends don’t know that I’m dating Corpse either. As I said, they are simping HARD over him while I act the most indifferent on the subject. Whenever they ask my opinion on him I either say ‘he’s OK’ or just avoid answering completely. I know saying anything more enthusiastic than that would turn into a snowball rolling down a snowy hill - I’d just keep babbling about how nice, amazing, wonderful and a gift to this world Corpse is, inevitably revealing our relationship in the process.
I’m afraid of revealing my relationship with Corpse in front of these people. They are all run on jealousy and selfishness and I can only imagine how mean they’d be about it. I’m already not too fond of them, it would only be worse if any of my personal life was exposed.
When the class finally ends I remove my headset, putting my forehead down on the desk, barely missing the keyboard. I groan in frustration and anger at myself for not fighting back. I could’ve and should’ve said something - ANYTHING. But what? That’s a question I can’t find the answer to.
“Hey...“ Corpse’s hesitant voice comes from behind me, “You ok?“
I straighten my posture, turning to him with a smile. “Yeah, but these people suck.”
I get up from my chair as he approaches me, basically falling in his arms. The comfort I feel radiating off of him makes me relax, forget the past hour or so. He has always had this effect on me. Like my own personal kryptonite to my anger and anxiety.
“Did I get you in any trouble because of that?“ His voice shows clear concern and guilt. 
I wrap my arms around him tighter, burying my head in his chest. “No, don’t worry about it.“ 
And I really wasn’t in trouble. Not until now that the video is officially posted....
I can call these people dumb all I want but they sure put two and two together awfully fast. They recognized the lines they heard during class as the same ones from his new video that came out almost a week after the incident, aka two days ago. It’s safe to say I haven’t touched my phone or computer since.
“This is all my fault.“
Of all the horrible things I suspected would happen this has to be the worst - Corpse is blaming himself for it. I am prepared to take all the shit these people have to throw at me but seeing Corpse beating himself up over this is killing me. No amount of convincing can change his mind. Nothing I say helps.
“Please, stop doing this to yourself. Non of this is your fault, Corpse.“ I’ve repeated this sentence more than a thousand time these past forty eight hours, each time saying it more and more desperately.
“All of it is my fault, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I hate myself so much.“ Has been his reply single time.
 I can’t watch him be so mean to himself. It’s the most conflicting thing when the person you love most is torturing themselves. It’s easy if it’s someone else doing it, you just kick their ass. But what are you supposed to do when the person you want to protect is the same one you need to protect them from.
Corpse has shut himself away in his recording room these past few hours and though he clearly needs to be alone, he still left the door open just a crack cause he knows I’ll be worried sick otherwise.
While I’m alone in the living room, I’ve finally managed to brace myself and build enough courage to power up my laptop. Last time it was on it was going mad with notifications.
“It’s digital. Only digital. It can’t hurt you too badly if it can’t touch you, right?“ I mumble to myself, already frustrated despite not having yet seen all the horrors that await me.
And horrors there were. Everywhere. Twitter. Instagram. Facebook.
My grades. Some pictures of me no one has ever seen. My school files. People from my class tweeting Corpse to ‘expose’ me for the ‘slut’ or ‘bitch’ I really am. Corpse hasn’t touched social media either and I plan on making sure it stays that way. God only knows how much worse he’ll get if he sees these claims.
And then, like a notification sent straight from hell, an email from my professor.
Practical lectures on Friday. Be here at 9 AM. Don’t forget your mask and gloves.
Good thing I opened my laptop when I did. Friday is tomorrow and I need to prepare for this day. Not only do I need to hit the books but I need to toughen up a bit. I can’t go there looking like I feel - like a mess.
Alright, time to put the brave face on. No more wallowing in it, at least not until tomorrow afternoon.
I make a study plan and hop in the shower. I feel the need to apologize to my hair for washing it so roughly, basically yanking at my strands from frustration that has been suppressed for too long.
I get our of the boiling hot shower, red as a lobster, and change into some clean comfortable clothes and put my ass in study mode. I remove all the scary expectations of the morning to come from my mind and let the information the textbooks has to offer seep into my brain.
                                                            *  *  *
I’m about to head out and, despite my put-together composure, I am a wreck inside. I actually put effort into my appearance, I mean - I even styled my hair. A pretty façade to hide a ruin.
I saw my friends’ texts last night, all three of them ending their friendship with me because they felt betrayed. I haven’t yet decided how to feel about that. Doesn’t matter at the moment, there are more important matters at hand, aka surviving the next three hours.
My college is within ten minutes walking distance from our apartment. That ten minute walk has never been so stressful, not even during exam season. The air feels a little harder to breathe, the path a little shorter to walk. And my moment of reckoning a little too close.
I feel eyes on me the second I start walking through the park of our campus. Sure, I could just be paranoid, but the feeling is too real to be just my imagination in overdrive. I’m glad I have my hair down and a mask on so the redness of my cheeks and neck isn’t on display. That’s a sign of weakness right now.
We have two an hour and a half long classes between which we have a snack break that’s half an hour. I usually enjoy that period but I’m dreading it now. These assholes can only be so mean in the presence of a professor, but during lunch break they can increase that tenfold. 
“Well if it isn’t Corpse’s girl.“ I hear that a lot. The whispers are not so much whispers as intentionally loud enough for me to hear remarks. I’m not bothered by them, it’s the least they can do. If I let such a simple thing get to me, I’d be crumbling by the end of first period.
I hear some shuffling behind me and out of the corner of my eye I see, yeah you guessed it, THAT bitch. She’s standing as close to me as she can without violating Covid regulations. A mask is covering her face but the menacing look in her eyes tells me all I need to know about the interaction that’s about to go down.
“I’d ask how much he pays you for the hour.....“ her long nails tap the wooden desk, “but that’d be rude. I bet it’s tough being a maid. Do you just clean or are you a multipurpose lap dog? No offense, I’m genuinely curious.“
“Vy, would you be so kind as to give Y/N some room to breathe?“ The professor asks as he nonchalantly walks in.
Vy rolls her eyes, batting her eyelashes at me, “Talk to you later, sweetheart.” With a fake friendly wave she’s out of my hair, at least for now.
Remember what I said about these people not being as dumb as I pegged them to be? Yeah, scratch that. These fuckers actually tried getting away with taking pictures of me with flash in broad daylight. Like, HELLO! I have two functioning eyes and a brain, I’m onto you. Sadly, me having figured out their childish but hurtful methods of humiliating me doesn’t change much. They still posted the pics they took, using the most derogatory terms they could find in the English language, always making sure to tag Corpse and me both.
Needless to say, these were the longest three hours of my life.
                                                              *  *  *
Shutting the door to our apartment behind me causes relief of the highest levels. I feel like I’ve locked out all the bad shit I have had to deal with these past twenty four hours. 
I’m tired. I’m fucking exhausted. I feel like a discarded piece of paper. 
And it all starts crumbling. A wall is bound to start slowly falling apart after being hit over and over again, each time feeling the blows with a stronger intensity. 
I slide down the door sitting down on the floor and slowly taking my shoes off. I put my bag beside me and wrap my arms around my knees, hiding my head in the space between them and my chest.
One tear slides down my cheek.
Another follows.
And another, this time accompanied by a choked sob.
A pair of arms wraps around the ball that my body has been shaped into. One of his hands comes up to stroke my hair gently, feeding me the comfort I have been longing for since I left the apartment this morning.
“I saw it. All of it. All the shit they talk about you. All the names they call you. And I’ve never wanted to beat so many people up simultaneously.“ His words make me raise my head from its low position, giving him a knowing look. “I wish I could. I would, but that would land me in jail. Which doesn’t even sound so bad cause I don’t like going out. Only problem is you wouldn’t be with me. I wouldn’t want you to be there with me, don’t get me wrong, I’d never want you to end up in jail. I-...” I cut him off by pressing my lips to his. A quick kiss that says so much but mainly shows the immeasurable gratitude for his support.
Seeing those awful tweets and comments had the complete opposite effect on him. He no longer blames himself but the people who actually deserve the blame - all those jerks from my college.
I pull away, giving him a small smile. “I would never let you go to jail.” 
He smiles back at me, overjoyed that my mood is slowly being lifted, “Come on, I have a nice crowd that would like to meet you.”
I know exactly what he means. Felix, Sean, Rae, Dave, Sykkuno and the rest of his friends. The people I’ve been so shy and afraid to meet since day one. Being shy doesn’t really make sense now, seeing as how they know I exist and that I’m a part of Corpse’s life. 
What do I have to lose?
“Guys, this is my girlfriend, Y/N.“ Corpse’s black avatar runs around my cyan one in the Among Us lobby.
I can’t help but giggle when I unmute my mic, “Hi everyone! It’s so nice to finally meet you.“ They each introduce themselves, expressing how happy they are to be meeting me too.
It’s the first time in what feels like a while that I’m truly having fun. These people are wonderful, each so unique and lovely. They never brought up the scandal nor acted as though they knew about it. I know they did and I am beyond grateful that they never mentioned it or treated me any differently because of it. Also, Corpse was streaming the whole time. I had my phone on his stream, my eyes nervously scanning the chat every now and then. I couldn’t believe it. Corpse’s real fans were just as wonderful as his friends - they were nothing but supportive and happy to have met me.
Now, I can either choose to believe these people were being so nice to me out of sympathy or I can believe they really like me and appreciate me for who I am and not for what happened to me. 
I choose to believe the latter.
And while I’m still getting accustomed to this whole new spotlight, I know I’ll be able to handle it as long as I’m holding Corpse’s hand in the process. All I need is to have him beside me and I’m prepared to tackle anything.
“They love you.“ Corpse tells me once the stream is done and we’ve hopped out of the Discord call, “But I love you more.“
His arms wrap around my waist while mine instinctively find their way around his neck, “I love them, too. But they’re at the number 2 spot.”
He smirks at me, “I wonder who’s at number 1.”
I push up on my toes, putting my lips an inch away from his, “Hmm, I wonder...”
He doesn’t let me finish, silencing my teasing with a sweet, loving kiss.
@susceptible-but-siriusexual  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @hacker-ghost  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat
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niuniente · 3 years ago
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I love the new chapter so much! I think its so cute! And I love that the two got together.
I'd just like to point out that there are a few (4) drawings of Pearl that's missing her cat ears in the begining of the comic.
Wow, good catch for such a big fuck up from me. Thank you! I kept forgetting her ears quite often as I was so concentrated on getting her head shape right with the ponytail :D I'll fix that, though I don't know can I get the fixed pages to Tumblr because of how this site is formatted.
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allywritesforfun · 3 years ago
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ok so like… HAPPY 1K FUCKING FOLLOWERS LETS GO BABY
that’s a fucking lot of you. like holy shit. that’s like 1000 mcchickens. that’s a lot. sorry i’m gonna say “a lot” a lot because holy fuck.
and you can bet your ass that my narcissistic ass is thriving right now.
okay okay all jokes aside and me messing around, that seriously is a lot and number i didn’t even knew i could count to. thank you guys so much! thank you to especially @boiled-onionrings, my wife, because she give me so much support and reassurance and she’s literally the best <3 and @simpoot because you give me so much amazing advice, like without you, idk i would’ve probably gotten canceled /j and last but certainly not least @sunniewrites for keeping me motivated and in the loop with everything.
thank you to my amazing mutuals, anons, and my tumblr family. i love you all and interacting literally makes my day. (check masterlist for everyone’s @‘s)
i love you all. here is my event…
Allywritesforfun 1k Followers Event!!!!
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The Alphabet Drabble Event!
information: everyone is familiar with the alphabet drabbles right? usually it’s like “gnf dating alphabet” and it’s like A is for… well that’s basically what i’m doing but we’re adding a little spice. for this event, it’s gonna follow that exact same format, but you have to give me specific topic. like ‘dating’ is too broad and i want some weird and unusual requests. we’re gonna have so much fun.
1k followers masterlist
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Rules:
no nsfw requests
no different ethnicities or any diseases for i am not an expert and there are other writers who can do so much better than i can
only request MCYT’s that i write for. list is here
all requests are automatically gonna be gender neutral/genderless
be creative with this!
no angst or break-ups
(any requests that break the rules will be deleted)
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How to Request:
send me an ask in my inbox (top right corner of my page)
list the cc!/c! that you would like (if not listed i will choose)
list if platonic or romantic (if not listed i will choose)
name what category/situation and be creative, out of the ordinary, and specific with it
if you want, you can give me what some letters want to be or the full thing (example of what i mean below)
a good example: can i please get cc!gnf water skiing alphabet and can “L” be location?
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Extra Information:
if you wanna be added to the 1k taglist follow these rules
anon list
regular masterlist
just another huge thank you to everyone who has gotten me to this point. it is the absolute best feeling in the world seeing any tumblr notifications and just wow. i feel so special right now and on top of the world. like i’m just some random depressed bisexual from wisconsin with an unhealthy obsession with writing like idk what i did to make everyone follow me. i started this account to just mess around and get ideas out of my head, i never thought i would get this far but holy shit thank you so much!!
i love you, you are valued, you mean so so so much to me <33
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aomineavenue · 4 years ago
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Hi there. How is everyonnnnne doing. Wow, I haven't been here in awhile. I don't know if this post is going to be a long one or not since I'm writing this as I go, I apologize if I repeat stuff along the way.
Anyway, I want to apologize for my disappearance. It hasn't been a good time for me lately. One of the main reasons that I've strayed from tumblr was because of silly petty drama that keeps being mentioned over and over and over so many fucking times despite it being OVER. I don't have to mention what it is, if you know about it then well yknow about it that's all I'll be saying. What I will say about it is that it's pretty mentally fucking exhausting having to deal with every other month. I just couldn't understand the need to purposely bring it up every now and then as if it's still relevant despite myself being M.I.A (lol funny that's my name ok lol moving on)
Despite it being months since then, it's still being brought up so immaturely. I don't understand the difficulty of just shutting up and moving past it. Like, move on? No one literally cares? No one is talking about it anymore so what is the point?
It was mentally exhausting having to deal with, especially with useless anons (lol i have the ip address btw lol) sending crap about it so childishly.
Along the way, I drifted my focus to my real life. Focusing on my career and work has been draining me, so I didn't even have the time to deal with it.
You guys know me, if you're a mutual that's still around or a follower who has been with me since I started this account, I rarely respond to anonymous harrassment because there was no point of giving them any attention that they were seeking or letting others stick their noses into other people's business. I was made out to be spreading lies and hate, when I did nothing of the sort. I was barely around. I only even really talk to a handful of people because my life didn't revolve around tumblr/fandom whatever you want to call it.
Piece of advice? You don't want people sticking their noses into your business or bothering you? Then don't pay them any attention and broadcasting every single fucking thing just to point fingers like a child crying for attention afterwards.
Don't get me wrong, guys. I'm not quitting. I've just been away due to my mental health and two other reasons.
One, my phone has given up on me. So creating SMAUs has been impossible for the time being.
Two, my laptop has given up on me as well and I can't use company property for my personal business. So writing and editing has also been impossible.
I do not want to abandon my stories because it hurts to think so since I've plotted everything out already (thank fuck for google docs) So I'm just letting you guys know where I'm at right now. It's been a struggle but I'm slowly getting back on my feet.
I'd like to thank the few people who continue to give me love and support despite me not being able to contact anyone first anymore. Just having them reach out gives me warmth so I appreciate you guys.
Annnnnd, just a little something for you guys to know. My SMAUs, if I'm able to, I was thinking of converting the rest of the chapters into written format instead but I don't know if you guys would be interested that way.
If you read through this, kisses and let me know if I should. Sending all my love. Since it's still the pandemic, please do everything you can to stay positive because negativity is a total bitch.
To my main loves, I miss you all so much. I haven't been in contact lately and I apologize. I hope you're all doing okay. @keijikunn @hidden-otaku-stuff @kaitycole @shoyomeow @newfriendjen @crescentsteel @teyvatstories @velvetfireworks @toorusushijima @lettrespromises
I'll be seeing you guys again, real soon but goodbye for now. Xx
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pascalpanic · 3 years ago
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hi there! i thought i would join in on the “sleepover weekend” lol. so my first question is, and i apologize if you’ve already been asked this, what was the first piece of pedro’s work that you saw/got you hooked? for me it was narcos. when i saw him in his first scene w carillo i was like oh no..... this is going to develop into something 💀
and my second question is, do you have any advice for people who are just starting out writing fanfiction? like if they feel embarrassed about their work, etc. i may or may not be asking for a friend ;)
yes hello welcome pull up ur sleeping bag and get ur mud mask ready
SO the only thing I’d seen pedro in (consciously) when I got into him was Mando and tbh... I actually thought he was ugly when they took off the helmet in season one I KNOW I KNOW I regret it. buuuuut I was watching season 2 and during the brown eyes scene I was like wow. woooooow. and then I got into some of his other stuff, I think from there I watched Narcos but this was after I got a tumblr specifically to read din fics. this blog has been around a while but I changed it to be a writing blog as of January when I fell for Frankie! Narcos was my first introduction to pedro besides Din/Star Wars
and 2: I got so into reading fic that I was listening to tiny dancer by Elton John and yearning (I actually had a bf at the time but he wasn’t shit but that’s another story) and I thought oh my fucking god this would be so cute with Frankie, so I got inspired and wrote Tiny Dancer (which, please don’t judge me for, it was my first thing in a long time)
and from there? like formatting and posting etc? honestly the biggest thing was making friends. like I asked @mandoalorian for help bc she seemed so sweet (spoiler alert: she is). she taught me how to do warnings and tags and format a fic post and was overall an angel.
if your friend wants, feel more than free to hmu and I’d love to help you out!! I LOVE beta reading fics and editing writing (that’s actually what I’m in college for lmao) so I’d love to help you with ideas, flow, syntax, or the actual posting part
thanks for asking lovely!!!
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